New Publication: Leadership thoughts

This month, instead of my monthly ezine, I offer you my new publication: Leadership thoughts.

I hope you will consider to order a copy (call onthedot at 0861 668 368 or email direct.sales@onthedot.co.za quoting the title and ISBN nr: 978 0 627 02790 1) or email the pamphlet to someone who might be interested. The book should also be available at Exclusive Books bookshops by next week.

 

Best wishes

 

Gerhard

 

_______________________________________________

Dr Gerhard van Rensburg (DTh, MCom Leadership)

Executive and leadership coach (Member of Comensa)

0834556513

www.neweraleadership.co.za

 

FW: New Era Leadership: Our fears and what they tell us

OUR FEARS AND WHAT THEY TELL US

 

To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. Not to dare, is to lose oneself - Søren Kierkegaard

 

The perfect is the enemy of the good – Voltaire

 

We either learn to fail or we fail to learn – Tal Ben-Shahar

 

When we persist in looking at the shadow side, we will eventually end up in the dark - Henri Nouwen

 

Our fears are as much, if not more, part of who we are as our joys – even though we talk much easier about our joys than our fears. What do we fear? The most common answer to this question is ‘failure’. Well, failure in what sense? I believe that the fear we have for failure is more specifically the fear to be seen as failure. If I am all on my own and set myself the goal to climb to the top of a high mountain I might be concerned that perhaps I will not make it, but not fearful. However, if I am in a group of people the fear of being seen as a failure if I do not make it will be real.

 

If you could know, really know, that no-one will ever think of you as a failure if you cannot achieve your performance targets it will certainly take away the fear factor – and it will certainly help you in giving it your best shot. So in essence it is the fear of not being recognised, respected or valued by others. It follows that the less we experience or experienced (in our childhood and youth) evidence of others unconditional love, recognition, appreciation and respect, the more fearful and driven we become. We are then driven by the fear of loosing whatever respect we feel we have and/or by the desperate feeling to earn (more) respect.

 

There are many more things we fear … if we come to think of it. We fear illness and age. We fear tragedy, violence and physical harm. We fear loss of income and lowering our standard of living. We fear harm to our loved ones. We fear the unknown and loss in any sense of the word. But most of all we fear to be worthless. As Viktor Frankl explained, you can overcome anything if you have a sense of worth and meaning.  He quotes Nietzsche who said: He who has a Why to live for can bear almost any How. The Why, we can add, is not satisfied with scientific explanations of our history but only by an internalised belief about our purpose.

 

It is true that we can be overwhelmed and paralysed with fear when we stare a threat to our well-being in the face, but we are at our most vulnerable when we sense loss of worth or meaning. Our death looks different if we can believe that our life had meaning … lasting meaning. Our quest in life is not pleasure or power, but meaning. Yes, pleasure and power can help us to forget the feeling of meaninglessness for a while, but it will return until we have answered the call for meaning. Whether we like it or not, we are constantly challenged with the question what we believe in and how we live according to that belief.   

 

Our self-doubt with regards to our worth often manifests in arrogance. We try our level best to create the impression that we are OK, we have everything under control. If, at the same time, we can create confusion in other people’s minds and get them to doubt their worth, so much the better. Our (subconscious) thinking is that it can only help if others are too scared (what if he attacks and belittles me) to try and expose our image of Mr Perfect. And so we can succeed in the creation of cultures of fear where everything becomes a political game and you have the main players dominating the centre stage and the quiet but disgruntled spectators. In the meantime our insecurity prevents us from moving out of our comfort zones. We project a brave and powerful image but we never act accordingly – the unknown is too much of a threat to our carefully built but fragile image.            

 

Self-rejection and feelings of being worthless can make us fall in the trap of perfectionism. We try to cover-up our insecurity with pretensions and blame on others. As a perfectionist you work and live with an unrealistic idea of life. The idea of perfect does not empower us. Rather, it makes us critical of everyone and everything except ourselves, while it discourages us to personally commit and try out new things. That is why Voltaire reminds us that the perfect is the enemy of the good and that is why we either learn to fail or we fail to learn.

 

Being human and therefore vulnerable, where does it leave us as we face an uncertain future? Asked what he would do if the world would end tomorrow, Martin Luther answered ‘I would plant a tree today.’ To me it symbolizes the following:

 

·        We can express and feel our worth by doing what is before us as something meaningful (however small or simple it might seem)

·        Nothing can prevent us from giving meaning to every day, hour or minute we have to live

·        It is always a good time to celebrate the gift of life

 

Best wishes and I trust you will enjoy spring.

 

Gerhard

 

Remember my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:

 

·        Inspire yourself, inspire others
·        Resilience and tenacity
·        Accountability and responsibility
·        The illusion of security
·        The power of character
·        Excellence and success
·        Busyness and prioritising
·        Mental and spiritual fitness
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

GOD WALKER INITIATIVE

 

Take a moment to read more about this life enrichment series and visit our website and invitation to the Launch Chapter Experience.

 

Leadership, being different and the Desert Fathers

LEADERSHIP, BEING DIFFERENT AND THE DESERT FATHERS

 

Without solitude we remain victims of our society and continue to be entangled in the illusions of the false self- Henri Nouwen

 

The mass man … he is the shell of a man ... he lacks an inner self, an intimacy ... a self that cannot be revoked - Jose Ortega

 

The more we hear disappointing news about poor or no service delivery, incompetence, lack of urgency and commitment, corruption and greed, or experience it ourselves, the more we ask: why can’t there be better, more responsible and competent leaders? For a moment we might even think … like ourselves. Are our expectations of a better and more just world for all realistic? Are we guilty of imagining that somehow, somewhere, there is a reservoir of good leaders ready to take over where others are failing? Why would the replacements be different? ‘Being different’ is indeed key to effective leadership and a legitimate expectation of leaders. Where does the difference need to be?

 

Leadership is more an art than a science. It is more about heart and will than it is about mind and calculations. It is more about the depth and power of our inspiration than it is about the width and reach of our knowledge and networks. As it is with an artist, the leader also loses his creative and transforming ability if he is not inspired. From our inspiration comes our commitment, our strength and our resilience. It begs the question: where do we find and sustain inspiration?

 

Many, many years ago, in the 4^th century, a group of people called the Desert Fathers regarded society as a shipwreck from which each single individual man had to swim for his life. These were men who believed that to let oneself drift along, passively accepting the tenets and values of what they knew as society, was purely and simply a disaster. They lived their lives in solitude and devotion to God in the Egyptian desert. Do you perhaps share their view and sometimes quietly wonder if it would not be better to leave everything behind and go and live in the Kalahari desert?

 

In the centuries to follow, since the time of the Desert Fathers, tradition and religion (through religious institutions) became the cornerstones and sources of inspiration to most people of the world who, typically, lived in small and intimate communities. The role of society was obviously viewed more favourably than what the Desert Fathers thought of society under Roman rule. Industrialisation, urbanisation and modernisation since the 18^th century, however, turned societies, their needs and philosophies of life, upside down. Early in the 20^th century Max Scheler described Western culture as ‘in the midst of a moral and cultural crisis’. The root of this crisis was according to him ‘a vast process of equalization that produced a homogeneous and monoton­ous society only superficially integrated by political and state mechanisms’. He was of the view that modern man is ceasing to be an individual and only part of the mass.

 

The modern man or mass man, according to the above description, clearly cannot be an inspiration to others, yet yearns for inspiration. To what extent do you think this describes our society? Don’t we often, after all the excitement that mass media can create, think to ourselves: it is more of the same, only packaged differently? How often do you think to yourself ‘talk, talk, talk … ’ after a meeting, social gathering, sales presentation, public speech or news broadcast? How truly fruitful are all the opinions that we express, all the words we speak? Will people not often be served better by our silence than our words? How often do we really feel understood when we speak about our ideas or feelings? As Henri Nouwen says: ‘Words often leave us with a sense of inner defeat. They can even create a sense of numbness and a feeling of being bogged down in swampy ground.’ I also agree with him when he says that ‘without solitude we remain victims of our society and continue to be entangled in the illusions of the false self.’ And I believe that especially leaders, who hope to make sustained and positive differences in society, need to practice solitude.

 

Solitude, not in the sense that we need to get away from the rush to recharge our batteries so that we can come back to fight the competition with new vigor and dedication. If we don’t want to remain victims of society and ‘continue to be entangled in the illusions of the false self’, it will take a lot more than the quick breakaway. If our practice of solitude does not result in our own transformation and growth, then it will do little more than helping us to cope with the world of rapid changes, constant stimulation and stress. Solitude, as the term is used here, incorporates reflecting on what is happening in our relationships and what course our life is taking. It incorporates listening to the voices of our heart, soul and conscience. And for the believer it incorporates listening to God. If you believe in God, you want Him to intervene in your life, your thoughts and actions. You want Him to inspire and transform you. We need to fashion our own desert where we can shake off our compulsions and focus on what is in our heart and spirit. We need to learn to bear our own faults and not to pay attention to others, wondering whether they are good or bad.  

      

What appears to be so simple and easy to do, as we know, is a major challenge in our time. One reason is that silence has become a fearful thing. We get so used to noise and constant stimulation that the idea of empty space and silence scares us. In meetings we find that people close the gap of silence as soon as it appears and those who are too slow off the mark tell themselves they need to work on the ability to jump in with the next opinion/comment. People can feel itchy and nervous when it is silent. Seeking and embracing solitude, therefore, is not a common thing. Likewise, good leaders. Most of us are intimidated by the modern belief that there is no greater sin than inactivity. We are trained to use the excuse of one more phone call, one more email, one more visit, one more meeting or one more party … then I will get to the good things I need to do.

 

Leaders who will be able to make a difference are clearly those who also do things differently, who are prepared to live differently and make different choices to the masses.

 

Diadochus of Photiki offers us a very concrete image:

 

When the door of the steambath is continually left open, the heat inside rapidly escapes through it; likewise the soul, in its desire to say many things, dissipates its remembrance of God through the door of speech, even though everything it says may be good. Thereafter the intellect, though lacking appropriate ideas, pours out a welter of confused thoughts to any­one it meets, as it no longer has the Holy Spirit to keep its understanding free from fantasy. Ideas of value al­ways shun verbosity, being foreign to confusion and fantasy. Timely silence, then, is precious, for it is noth­ing less than the mother of the wisest thoughts. (from The Way of the Heart – Henri Nouwen)

 

May you experience good things in August 2009!

 

Best regards 

 

Gerhard

 

Remember my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:

 

·        Inspire yourself, inspire others
·        Resilience and tenacity
·        Accountability and responsibility
·        The illusion of security
·        The power of character
·        Excellence and success
·        Busyness and prioritising
·        Mental and spiritual fitness
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

GOD WALKER INITIATIVE

 

Take a moment to read more about this life enrichment series and visit our website and invitation to the Launch Chapter Experience.

 

 

Gerhard van Rensburg (Phd, MCom leadership)

Leadership and Executive coach (Member of Comensa)

Cell: 0834556513/Fax: 0865016020

Email: gerhard@neweraleadership.co.za

Website: www.neweraleadership.co.za

 

New Era Leadership -

Unlocking potential through leadership

and organisational development

From feeling honoured to feeling entitled

 

FROM FEELING HONOURED TO FEELING ENTITLED

 

When a milestone is conquered, the subtle erosion called entitlement begins its consuming grind. The team regards its greatness as a trait and a right. Half hearted effort becomes habit and saps a champion.

Pat Riley

 

When a parent shows up with an attitude of entitlement, understand that under it is a boatload of anxiety.

Robert Evans

 

When you have the courage to stand up and tell it like it is, good people will come out of the woodwork to get behind you.

Jesse Ventura

 

We recently had our national election and as a result many people were replaced with new leaders at various levels of government. What can one expect them to say as they take their new positions? Most likely they will say what we all say when we become aware of others’ positive expectations and recognition: ‘Thank you. I feel honoured.’ What can we read into such a statement? What would we like to read into such a statement? My guess is that, when we think about others, we would like to think that they truly mean it. That is, they feel they are offered something valuable that can be taken away from them, namely people’s admiration and respect. We would hope that the person who says he feels honoured to lead a nation, an institution, a company, a congregation, a department, a project or a sports team would be fully aware of the fact that it is not the position (for the sake of the position) that is offered to him, but the responsibility and opportunity.

 

So, if we are in the position of being entrusted with responsibility and opportunity, what are we more conscious of: the privilege of being seen as worthy of others’ trust and belief in us? Or the added status, income and other benefits that come with the position? If it is the former we will get up in the morning challenged by the question: how will I be worthy of others’ trust and the responsibility of my role and balance it with other roles and responsibilities that I have? If it is the latter it is predictable that sooner or later the ‘subtle erosion called entitlement begins its consuming grind’. It is amazing how the initial feeling of being honoured can be replaced by the feeling of ‘I am entitled’ – often in a very short space of time. Saying ‘I feel honoured’ communicates the notion ‘I am in your hands’ and ‘I owe my best efforts to you’. ‘Entitlement’ elevates the individual in his own mind above others. The main challenges for a person with an attitude of entitlement are the challenge to secure his current position and the aspiration for a higher and more powerful position.  

 

No-one is above the temptations that come with a position of leadership. The difference between a good leader, sustained growth and good results and a bad leader, no real changes and disillusionment are more often than not the willingness and alertness of the leader to recognise the dangers of entitlement early on. As it is in leadership, the leader’s attitude of entitlement quickly become that of the team and ends up as a general culture. The veneer of bravery and power that we see in positional leaders is often no more than an attempt to disguise feelings of anxiety. The problem is that those feelings only become stronger in the absence of application and results. Therefore, as Robert Evans’s quote suggests: be prepared to face your own anxieties before your ‘I feel honoured’- speech. 

          

Jesse Ventura was an American professional wrestler in the 70’s and 80’s – a very improbable state governor! After retirement as a wrestler he became a commentator where he frequently sided with the villains of the sport. He was outspoken and prepared to be the target of the public in his own radio talk show. He was described as a multi-faceted personality and a strong character who is capable of achieving anything he sets his mind to. Earlier in his life he joined an elite unit in the Navy with the purpose to cure his fear for heights. At the age of 39 he lived with his wife and two children in a neighbourhood in Brooklynn Park, Minnesota, when developers wanted to start a number of building projects in their area. The local residents were strongly against it. In spite of a strong petition the council however went ahead with their plans.   

 

Ventura decided to do some investigations into the workings of the council. He discovered that most decisions of the council were taken unanimously but against the will of the people. Their hypocrisy infuriated him and he decided to do something about it. He attended the city council meetings and launched a grassroots effort to inform public about the vast corruption in their city government, and he laid out a plan to correct it. He organised to televise the council meetings and got people involved when hot topics were debated. It worked. He stated at the time: ‘The only way the system will ever change is if enough well-meaning private sector people get involved in their local government for the right reasons’. To cut a long story short, he eventually became the governor of Minnesota and remained as strong and independent in his thinking as ever. When asked to explain why he think he was elected against all the odds he said: ‘If I had to pick one reason people voted for me, I would have to say that it is because I tell the truth. I stand tall and speak freely, even when it isn’t politically expedient to do so.’ He enjoyed the highest job-approval rating of any governor in the history of Minnesota.

 

Jesse Ventura’s story is just one example of a leader who was strong enough to resist the temptation of entitlement. Can we look forward to leadership in South Africa that would resemble the same characteristics?      

 

Best regards 

 

Gerhard

 

Remember my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:

 

·        Inspire yourself, inspire others
·        Resilience and tenacity
·        Accountability and responsibility
·        The illusion of security
·        The power of character
·        Excellence and success
·        Busyness and prioritising
·        Mental and spiritual fitness
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

GOD WALKER INITIATIVE

 

Take a moment to read more about this life enrichment series and visit our website and invitation to the Launch Chapter Experience on the 23^rd - 25^th of July.

 

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

 

FW: New Era Leadership: Towards a productive life - mastering your thoughts

 

TOWARDS A PRODUCTIVE LIFE – MASTERING YOUR THOUGHTS

 

Your life is what your thoughts make it.
- Marcus Aurelius

 

If you have time to whine and complain about something then you have the time to do something about it.

-      Anthony J. D'Angelo

 

When any fit of gloominess, or perversion of mind, lays hold upon you, make it a rule not to publish it by complaints. 

- Samuel Johnson

 

In these times of rapid changes at all levels and in all spheres of life we can ask ourselves how well we are coping. How skillful are we in riding the waves as they come one after the other? How well do we do not only individually, but also as families, work organisations, different institutions and as a nation. Can you imagine that the rate of change will ever slow down and that we will somehow return to the style of living of twenty, fifty, hundred or thousands years ago? It seems like a wild fantasy. What seems credible is that the speed and extent of changes will increase in future.

 

It is obvious that the more honest we are in answering the question how we are mastering the changes, the better are our chances of learning from our past responses and preparing ourselves, especially mentally, for whatever lies ahead. If I think of recent or still present examples of change then the change of our country’s president and cabinet leaders immediately comes to mind. Another major change was/is the economic meltdown. What is your assessment when you compare your expectations of a Zuma-led government three years ago (Zuma’s rape trial ended in May 2006) with the current status of our country and Zuma’s leadership? Did you have better, more optimistic, or worse and more pessimistic expectations of what the health of the ‘patient’ (South Africa) would be today? What was your expectation of what the Rand’s value would be months after Zuma’s election and how the South African economy would stand up in a worldwide financial crisis as we have experienced?

 

Do you recognise our human tendency to avoid answering questions that compare our fear-based expectations in the past with reality once we have gone past the milestone? When things are not as bad as we expected or even predicted them to be, do you recognise our tendency to quickly shift the focus to the uncertain, fear provoking, future with ‘yes but it remains to be seen if things will not deteriorate in future…’.     

 

If we allow our human tendency to get the better of us as we face a world/life of changes, it does not take long to snowball into easily recognised negative influence and negative energy. We become moaners. A verse in the Bible teaches that we should do everything without complaining or arguing so that we can shine like stars in a crooked and depraved generation. The more we complain, the dimmer our lights of positive influence become. One example of negative influence would be the whiner. Have you come across people who always find a reason to grumble. ‘My life is a mess’; ‘How did I get myself involved in this?’; ‘Life is not fair! I am working myself to the ground while others with much less effort get paid twice as much’; ‘I should have qualified myself in a different direction - it is too late now to do anything about it’.

 

Oscar Wilde described the pessimist as follows: He is someone who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.

 

Then there is the martyr. ‘Agh you know, it is a lousy job but someone must do it’; ‘Somehow I always end up with all the nonsense’; ‘However hard I try to do things right, I always get picked on!’; ‘I have no luck, whatever I do’.

 

Mark Twain reminds us: Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

 

Do you know the cynic? ‘The more we try to improve things the more they stay the same. We are wasting our time. There is nothing you can do about it!’; ‘Don’t ask me why, I just know it will not work.’; ‘People don’t change.’; ‘You can’t trust people.’; ‘Life is pointless.’

 

Robert Byrne’s view rings true: The purpose of life is a life of purpose. But then you still need to ask the question: If Hitler lived a purposeful life, as I think he did, can his life be seen as an example of the ‘purpose of life’? I would strongly disagree with such a view. You therefore still need to ask: ‘Do I have the right purpose?’

 

Then lastly, there is the perfectionist. A characteristic of the perfectionist is that he applies different standards to others than to himself. He could be very good in certain areas but typically refuses to admit to weaknesses in other areas. When in a position of authority he can be very pedantic and critical of others’ performances. ‘Have you dotted the “i’s” and crossed all the “t’s”?’; ‘I am happy with the 80% but what went wrong with the rest?’ Another hallmark is the perfectionist’s impatience and inclination to nag others to act in accordance to his ideals.  

 

Henry Miller has an answer for the perfectionist: The imperfections of a man, his frailties, his faults, are just as important as his virtues. You can't separate them. They're wedded. And an Italian proverb highlights the tragic consequences of a perfectionist mindset: He that will have a perfect brother must resign himself to remain brotherless. 

 

Is there anyone of us who do not become negative at times and make himself guilty of one or more of the above attitudes or behaviours? How do we master our thoughts in order to shine like stars in a crooked and depraved generation?

 

Admit your own imperfections. A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance. Proverbs 28:13

 

Accept responsibility. Some people ruin themselves by their own stupid mistakes and then blame the Lord. Proverbs 19:3

 

Learn to live with gratitude and contendness. I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. Phil 4:11

 

Develop broader spiritual perspectives. So we fix our attention not on the things that are seen, but on the things that are unseen. What is seen lasts only for a time, but what cannot be seen lasts forever. 2 Cor 4:18

 

Practice constructive habits. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Eph 4:29

 

Is it not true that people who live according to these principals have a wonderfully positive and productive impact on the social and work climate wherever they go?    

 

Enjoy the month of June and ride the waves of change as a professional surfer would do.

 

Best regards 

 

Gerhard

 

Remember my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:

 

·        Inspire yourself, inspire others
·        Resilience and tenacity
·        Accountability and responsibility
·        The illusion of security
·        The power of character
·        Excellence and success
·        Busyness and prioritising
·        Mental and spiritual fitness

 

FW: New Era Leadership: Hopeful signs?

If you once forfeit the confidence of your fellow citizens, you can never regain their respect and esteem. It is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all of the time; but you can't fool all of the people all of the time – Abraham Lincoln

 

The really valuable thing in the pageant of human life seems to me not the State but the creative, sentient individual, the personality; it alone creates the noble and the sublime. . .

 – Albert Einstein

 

You know, there's a lot of talk in this country about the federal deficit. But I think we should talk more about our empathy deficit -- the ability to put ourselves in someone else's shoes; to see the world through the eyes of those who are different from us -- the child who's hungry, the steelworker who's been laid-off, the family who lost the entire life they built together when the storm came to town. When you think like this -- when you choose to broaden your ambit of concern and empathize with the plight of others, whether they are close friends or distant strangers -- it becomes harder not to act; harder not to help – Barack Obama

 

I trust your voting experience was a positive one. Listening to the analysis and interviews on TV with 30% of the votes counted, it sounds as if the major parties are all happy with the results. If it is an indication of political leaders feeling hopeful, energised and positive about the contributions they want to make in the next five years or so, then it is certainly good news. I am sure that in spite of the many things that might frustrate, irritate and disappoint you about our adolescent democracy – and the various high profile role players - you also appreciate the fact that so many South Africans voted in peace and embrace the principles of democracy. With a collective stronger opposition that represents all races and thus weakens the race argument, it will hopefully lead to less complacency and more competitiveness amongst government’s office bearers.

 

This month I am not sending you an article. I, however, have a request. With my monthly letters I aim to provide positive, informative and hopefully inspirational ideas that people like yourself can relate to or find relevant to your own experiences and life questions. An underlying theme is leadership - in the sense that every individual lead his/her own life. We can choose to lead it more or less pro-actively, consciously and effectively with the choices we make. The better we fare in developing our own potential, the better we are also equipped to lead others.  

 

My request is that you will send me the names and email addresses of 3 or more people who might also have an interest in my writings.

 

It is a request and PLEASE do not feel obliged whatsoever to do so.

 

Thank you and vasbyt. I hope the month of May treat you well.

 

Best regards 

 

Gerhard

 

Remember my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:

 

·        Inspire yourself, inspire others
·        Resilience and tenacity
·        Accountability and responsibility
·        The illusion of security
·        The power of character
·        Excellence and success
·        Busyness and prioritising
·        Mental and spiritual fitness

 

 

_________________________________________________

Gerhard van Rensburg (Phd, MCom leadership)

Leadership and Executive coach (Member of Comensa)

Cell: 0834556513/Fax: 0865016020

Email: gerhard@neweraleadership.co.za

Website: www.neweraleadership.co.za

 

New Era Leadership -

Unlocking potential through leadership

and organisational development

New Era Leadership: Intuition, science or spiritual guidance

 

How much do we know at any time? Much more, or so I believe, than we know we know!- Agatha Christie

 

The easiest person to deceive is one's self

-      Robert Bulwer-Lytton

 

There are two ways to live - one is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle – Albert Einstein

 

What proportion of your future will be determined by your calculated and knowledge-based decisions? What proportion will be determined by your intuitive feel for what you need to do and which direction you should follow? What proportion will be determined by luck or coincidence? What proportion, if not everything, is determined from eternity in a detailed divine plan? What proportion will be determined by in the moment divine intervention? If it is more than one of the above, what are the different proportions supposed to be? If you have the formula, please let us know!

 

Perhaps we could have saved ourselves a lot of trouble and perhaps we could have experienced much more happiness and enjoyment if we based our behaviours and personal strategies a lot more on known facts and the results of scientific research. We could have been cleverer and learned more about the cause and effect laws of life. On the other hand, things could have been a lot better for us if we followed our intuition a lot more than what we did. Perhaps we should have accepted that the way things unfold in life is not really determined by our own actions an plans; that everything is determined and written in a divine plan. It could have saved us a lot of worries and headaches. Perhaps we need to be looking a lot more for immediate divine intervention in our daily lives.

 

When we say that there are three groups of people, those who make things happen, those who watch things happen, and those who say, ‘what happened?’, we insinuate that people should take responsibility and control and make things happen. Those who don’t are parasites. We admire people who make things happen. But how many of those actions are based on wrong perceptions and assumptions and are we then really better off? In the situation where, with the economic turbulence that we are experiencing, you or others need to cut costs on the one hand and recognise and take new opportunities on the other, how do you decide what to do? When interviewing an applicant for a position, what in the final analysis determine your decision? How do you make up your mind about a relationship – whether you should commit and invest more of yourself or whether it is better to let go of it?

 

As with so many things in life, we are confronted with paradox when we try to find the best answers or solutions. On the one hand, as we get older, we can become more and more confident in our own ability to know what is right. We are convinced that we know more than we know we know – our intuition is a source of wisdom. On the other hand experience has taught us that more often than not we should reserve judgment about people, predictions and things that are stated as truths. Other people clearly deceive themselves many times and to be honest, we have to admit that it is easy to deceive oneself.        

 

Consider the following examples of typical self deception from David Myers’ very informative book, Intuition - its powers and perils.  

 

·         A group of students were shown a video of a young girl taking an oral achievement test in which she got some questions right and some wrong. Half the students previously were shown video material with the girl in a depressed urban setting. The other half were shown video material with the girl in an affluent suburban setting. The first half unconsciously inferred low ability and recalled her as missing half the questions. The other half inferred higher ability and recalled her as getting most questions right. In observing others, we can't resist making judgments. We speedily, spontaneously, and uninten­tionally infer others' traits. And often we are wrong.

 

·         Depending on our assumptions we construe reality differently. A group of people were shown different pictures of an expressionless man. In one of them there was a bowl of soup in front of him. The viewers intuition told them he was pensive. In another a dead woman was in front of him. The perceived him as sorrowful. And in another there was a happy girl and the viewers thought he seemed happy.

 

·         Mispredicting own behaviour. A group of people were give an example of a sexist remark. They were asked how they would respond in a real situation where someone would make such a statement. Would they say nothing or comment on its inappropriateness? 95% said they will respond in some way or another, 48% said they will comment on  inappropriateness. When the behaviour later was tested in a real situation 55% said nothing, only 16% criticised the person who made a sexist remark.

 

·         Hindsight bias. We tell ourselves we knew certain things all along when in reality it is only with hindsight that we can feel so self assured. Sometimes we will look at a couple and say ‘it’s obvious, opposites attract’. In a different situation we will say ‘it’s obvious, birds of a feather flock together’. Sometimes we conclude with certainty, ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’, other times we conclude ‘out of sight is out of mind’. Sometimes it’s clear that ‘too many cooks spoil the broth’ but in a different situation we feel that ‘two heads are better than one’. The point is that our confidence about our ability to judge correctly is with hindsight.

 

·         Self serving bias. How often will one hear someone saying ‘that's not fair! You're paying me too much.’ Or ‘what have I done to deserve this?’ If we follow our intuition about our own contributions we tend to over estimate them. If you ask a wife and husband to estimate what percentage of the time they each do the dishes, walk the dog, turn out the lights, or shop, their estimates will usually sum to more than 100 percent. Our intuitions do not insult us. Nine in ten managers rate themselves as superior to their average peer.

 

·         Over confidence. Testing people’s confidence about their knowledge researchers found that on average people will feel 75 percent sure of their answers when they are only 60 percent correct.

 

·         Belief perseverance. Once a belief forms, we filter information in ways that sustain it. When shown the findings of two research studies, one confirming and the other disconfirming their preexisting beliefs about capital punishment's supposed deterrent effect. Both groups readily accepted the evidence that confirmed their view but sharply criticized the evidence that challenged it. The result: showing the two sides an identical body of mixed evidence increased their disagree­ment.

 

·         Lastly, the human understanding supposes a greater degree of order in things than it really finds. Consider a random coin flip: If someone flipped a coin six times, which of the following sequences of heads (H) and tails (T) would seem most likely: HHHTTT or HTTHTH or HHHHHH? Most people be­lieve HTTHTH would be the most likely random sequence. Actually, all are equally likely (or, you might say, equally unlikely).

 

Didn’t you also feel that there is something almost sinister about Ricky Ponting’s streak of, I think 6 in a row, wins of the toss against Graeme Smith?

 

There are many more examples of how deceptive our perceptions can be, but I guess the above are sufficient to caution us against over-confidently following our intuition. In other words, we run the risk of making far reaching errors if we stubbornly tell ourselves that we don’t need others to help us in our assessment of situations, risks, opportunities or people. Furthermore, science offers us responsible guidance when we try to make sense and sound decisions in an increasingly complex world. But then there is still a third and even more fundamental dimension of knowing after our intuition and after science. Science can’t answer the ultimate questions: Why should I live? Why should I do anything? Is there in life any purpose that will not be destroyed by the inevitable death? Science does not pretend to answer such questions. When the early scientists such as Pascal, Bacon, Newton, and Galileo dedicated themselves to experiments, analysis and knowledge, they didn’t do so in rebellion against God but with a view of serving God as they explored the creation. They were wary of intuition and skeptic of human authority, but they humbly acknowledged God as Creator of everything and the Giver of purpose to life.  And Einstein with his superior analytical and scrutinising mind still believed that the universe, and therefore life, is a miracle.

 

When we consider how we make decisions and what will determine our future this and the other side of the grave, there is a place for our intuition, a place for science but no doubt also a place for our spiritual beliefs. Spiritual intelligence nowadays is acknowledged as fundamental also to how we function at work. Psychologist Robert Emmons identified the following components of spiritual intelligence:

 

·         The capacity for transcendence

·         The ability to sanctify everyday experience

·         The ability to experience heightened states of consciousness

·         The ability to utilize spiritual resources to solve problems

·         The capacity to engage in virtuous behaviour

 

Clearly, it is not the area of a perfect science. But it is the area that provides  deeper meaning, morality, compassion and hope in a world that is imperfect, unsafe and stained by human suffering, cruelty and despair.

 

We're all surely wrong to some extent. We glimpse ultimate reality only dimly and we always remain vulnerable and mortal. In finding our way forward we might want to pray a different version of Reinhold Niebuhr’s Serenity Prayer:

 

God, give us grace to accept the things that are true,

courage to challenge the things which are untrue,

and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.

 

Best wishes  

 

Gerhard

 

I repeat my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:

 

·        Inspire yourself, inspire others
·        Resilience and tenacity
·        Accountability and responsibility
·        The illusion of security
·        The power of character
·        Excellence and success
·        Busyness and prioritising
·        Mental and spiritual fitness