TOWARDS A PRODUCTIVE LIFE – MASTERING YOUR THOUGHTS
Your life is what your thoughts make it.
- Marcus Aurelius
If you have time to whine and complain about something then you have the time to do something about it.
- Anthony J. D'Angelo
When any fit of gloominess, or perversion of mind, lays hold upon you, make it a rule not to publish it by complaints.
- Samuel Johnson
In these times of rapid changes at all levels and in all spheres of life we can ask ourselves how well we are coping. How skillful are we in riding the waves as they come one after the other? How well do we do not only individually, but also as families, work organisations, different institutions and as a nation. Can you imagine that the rate of change will ever slow down and that we will somehow return to the style of living of twenty, fifty, hundred or thousands years ago? It seems like a wild fantasy. What seems credible is that the speed and extent of changes will increase in future.
It is obvious that the more honest we are in answering the question how we are mastering the changes, the better are our chances of learning from our past responses and preparing ourselves, especially mentally, for whatever lies ahead. If I think of recent or still present examples of change then the change of our country’s president and cabinet leaders immediately comes to mind. Another major change was/is the economic meltdown. What is your assessment when you compare your expectations of a Zuma-led government three years ago (Zuma’s rape trial ended in May 2006) with the current status of our country and Zuma’s leadership? Did you have better, more optimistic, or worse and more pessimistic expectations of what the health of the ‘patient’ (South Africa) would be today? What was your expectation of what the Rand’s value would be months after Zuma’s election and how the South African economy would stand up in a worldwide financial crisis as we have experienced?
Do you recognise our human tendency to avoid answering questions that compare our fear-based expectations in the past with reality once we have gone past the milestone? When things are not as bad as we expected or even predicted them to be, do you recognise our tendency to quickly shift the focus to the uncertain, fear provoking, future with ‘yes but it remains to be seen if things will not deteriorate in future…’.
If we allow our human tendency to get the better of us as we face a world/life of changes, it does not take long to snowball into easily recognised negative influence and negative energy. We become moaners. A verse in the Bible teaches that we should do everything without complaining or arguing so that we can shine like stars in a crooked and depraved generation. The more we complain, the dimmer our lights of positive influence become. One example of negative influence would be the whiner. Have you come across people who always find a reason to grumble. ‘My life is a mess’; ‘How did I get myself involved in this?’; ‘Life is not fair! I am working myself to the ground while others with much less effort get paid twice as much’; ‘I should have qualified myself in a different direction - it is too late now to do anything about it’.
Oscar Wilde described the pessimist as follows: He is someone who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.
Then there is the martyr. ‘Agh you know, it is a lousy job but someone must do it’; ‘Somehow I always end up with all the nonsense’; ‘However hard I try to do things right, I always get picked on!’; ‘I have no luck, whatever I do’.
Mark Twain reminds us: Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
Do you know the cynic? ‘The more we try to improve things the more they stay the same. We are wasting our time. There is nothing you can do about it!’; ‘Don’t ask me why, I just know it will not work.’; ‘People don’t change.’; ‘You can’t trust people.’; ‘Life is pointless.’
Robert Byrne’s view rings true: The purpose of life is a life of purpose. But then you still need to ask the question: If Hitler lived a purposeful life, as I think he did, can his life be seen as an example of the ‘purpose of life’? I would strongly disagree with such a view. You therefore still need to ask: ‘Do I have the right purpose?’
Then lastly, there is the perfectionist. A characteristic of the perfectionist is that he applies different standards to others than to himself. He could be very good in certain areas but typically refuses to admit to weaknesses in other areas. When in a position of authority he can be very pedantic and critical of others’ performances. ‘Have you dotted the “i’s” and crossed all the “t’s”?’; ‘I am happy with the 80% but what went wrong with the rest?’ Another hallmark is the perfectionist’s impatience and inclination to nag others to act in accordance to his ideals.
Henry Miller has an answer for the perfectionist: The imperfections of a man, his frailties, his faults, are just as important as his virtues. You can't separate them. They're wedded. And an Italian proverb highlights the tragic consequences of a perfectionist mindset: He that will have a perfect brother must resign himself to remain brotherless.
Is there anyone of us who do not become negative at times and make himself guilty of one or more of the above attitudes or behaviours? How do we master our thoughts in order to shine like stars in a crooked and depraved generation?
Admit your own imperfections. A man who refuses to admit his mistakes can never be successful. But if he confesses and forsakes them, he gets another chance. Proverbs 28:13
Accept responsibility. Some people ruin themselves by their own stupid mistakes and then blame the Lord. Proverbs 19:3
Learn to live with gratitude and contendness. I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. Phil 4:11
Develop broader spiritual perspectives. So we fix our attention not on the things that are seen, but on the things that are unseen. What is seen lasts only for a time, but what cannot be seen lasts forever. 2 Cor 4:18
Practice constructive habits. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Eph 4:29
Is it not true that people who live according to these principals have a wonderfully positive and productive impact on the social and work climate wherever they go?
Enjoy the month of June and ride the waves of change as a professional surfer would do.
Best regards
Gerhard
Remember my offer of inspirational talks on the following topics:
· Inspire yourself, inspire others
· Resilience and tenacity
· Accountability and responsibility
· The illusion of security
· The power of character
· Excellence and success
· Busyness and prioritising
· Mental and spiritual fitness
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