Some say knowledge is power, but that is not true. Character is power - Sathya Sai Baba ( Part 2)

As promised in my previous communication, I would like to explore the importance of ‘character’ further. If you can remember, last month I compared the importance of character to qualities such as competence and charisma. Our society today, particularly the business society, is highly geared to value, assess and hire competence – especially technical competence. Technical competence means knowledge, speed and efficiency – the things we believe will give us the advantage over our competitors. Charismatic personalities in leadership positions can make us who are associated with them, feel powerful and important as their persuasive and captivating rhetoric rub off on us. They can lure us into the good feeling that we are winners. Character? Well… maybe it will be good to know we have some people with character on board for the tough times - as a kind of insurance. If I read our times correctly, people are slowly but surely becoming aware of the modern world’s spiritual bankruptcy, re-evaluating character. There is a desire to turn within.


As I said last time, I think that our optimism that the world, or at least our world, can be fixed through some heroic acts or words of competent, charming and seemingly powerful people is fading. No doubt, we will continue to pride ourselves on efficiency and no doubt we will always enjoy those who communicate in an uplifting, inspirational manner. But maybe we have been disillusioned enough (older as well as younger people) with what looks and feels good for a while but doesn’t help us to feel content and at peace with ourselves and others. It is nice to be surrounded by knowledgeable people, but it is more meaningful, more sustaining, to be surrounded by people with character and wisdom – not merely as insurance when all else fails but as companions on our journey in life, both in our friendship and work circles. What’s more, no-one will dispute the need for dependable and trustworthy people in our organisations! And after all, it’s not a trade-off. We can have character, competence and charisma (the good version of charisma that is grounded in the authentic desire to serve others – I’d say Mandela has real charisma).



How would you describe a person with character? And how is character built? Let me share with you some personal reflections. I think I have met a person with character when I sense that he or she has high levels of self-awareness, knowing his/her strengths and weaknesses, believes in him/herself as a unique and worthy person, is humbled by the knowledge and consciousness of the fact that life is full of mystery - and that we are ultimately only affirmed in what we believe spiritually. Such a person knows he/she is infinitely more than his/her history, roles in life, achievements, physical abilities or material acquisitions. Do we develop character over time or are we born with it? Since my understanding of character is directly related to the quality and outcome of a person’s inner dialogue, I obviously believe we develop character over time. Indeed, our earliest experiences in life, the way we are brought up by our parents or caretakers, give us the platform that helps us to greater or lesser extent to develop character. From being connected ‘to the heartbeat of the cosmos in our mother's womb’, as James Hollis describe it in his excellent book The Middle Passage - from Misery to Meaning, we were suddenly thrust violently into the world to begin an exile and a search to recover the lost connectedness. Experiences of neglect, abandonment or being overwhelmed by life result in growing fears to open ourselves to the world of pain, which growth requires. And that, I’m afraid, is what it takes to build character. Conversely, running away, trying to hide from pain, or projecting it onto others, does not help.



Reflecting on my own life experience I was fortunate to have been brought up with a solid platform of love, care and nurturing. With life’s first project, building ego identity (according to Holis we do this from years 12 – 40), I had a good time. As we try to impose or project ourselves on the world out there (it’s me versus the world), discover our potential, stretch ourselves, dream our dreams of becoming a Springbok centre, pop star, respected professional and/or perfect husband or wife, we also build character. We learn to be strong and determined, to have tenacity. We manage our disappointments, dig deep for that someting extra in the face of adversities, stay positive and self-believing while we are searching for the next exciting challenge where we can proof our competence and value to society. However, we are unaware of the fact that our commitment to this project is determined by the false belief that we can re-connect with our true self – not the one that conformed to the expectations of our parents or society - by controlling life. We live and work with a wide range of assumptions and unrealistic expectations. One of the most powerful shocks we experience later in life, in Hollis’s words, ‘is the collapse of our tacit contract with the universe - the assumption that if we act correctly, if we are of good heart and good intentions, things will work out. We assume a reciprocity with the universe. If we do our part, the universe will comply.’



With hindsight, the real character building experience for me was not with life’s first project – building ego identity – but to later humbly accept that while I can’t control life, I can dare to be open to learn from the messages from my body and emotions and thus discover new meaning and wisdom. Not that it is a comfortable experience! In order to embrace new thinking and new knowledge about oneself, the old thinking must die. It leads to a lot of anxiety and doubt. (Again with hindsight, it is comforting to realise that all great advances in human understanding have come out of doubt.) The issue is not the details of my story - as you would have your own to tell - but that character building experiences occur when we turn within. In the earlier part of our lives it has a lot to do with our resolve and self-belief to overcome adversities while we are developing our ego’s and skills. Later in life it is to deal with our dissillusions with life, realising and accepting responsibility that the unrealistic expectations were of our own making – and to courageously face the feelings of disappointment and desolation while trusting our inner voice to guide us to a life of greater wisdom and fulfilment.



As you know, there is a lot more to be said and learned about our experiences of life, change and growth, but let me share one more thought. Going through character building life experiences help us to appreciate others more – knowing that we all experience hurt and intense loneliness at times. If in our organisations we could succeed in building the kind of community where we can support each other not only functionally but also emotionally, we would surely reap the fruits of a strengthened organisational character.



I will leave my usual African Renaissance contribution for next month.



Best wishes for the month of August.